10 Things I Haven’t Overheard This Spring

1. Big K.R.I.T… is he the bassist from that band Dashboard Confessional?

2. When does “This is 40” come out on blu-ray?

3. Call me crazy, but I think Macalester might make some waves in this whole March Madness business before it’s said and done.

4. Hey, where’d all those tight jeans from winter go? They looked so comfortable and perfect for those cold, shrunken marbles you call balls.

5. Um, yeah I have a summer job. Sure it pays well. I’m organizing my dad’s vinyl collection for $4.50 an hour.

6. Just when I was starting to like Plums the summer comes along! Blerggh

7. Party at the Ecohouse, biodegradable red cups only brah brah.

8. You can’t wear pastels after Easter, can you?

9. What’s up with all these St. Thomas guys and their fedoras?

10. I’m proud of you, son.

10 Things I Have Overheard This Spring:

1. Cafe Mac gets better every day. There’s just something about eating in the exact same place three times a day for fifteen straight weeks that I can’t get enough of.

2. I have a wedgie.

3. I’m sooo over homework lol ya know? Just, like, I’m done, not gonna do anymore, just don’t even give it to me haha. I’m just so over it, ya know?

4. Beet season is just around the corner!

5. There is a party at an athlete’s house and I will proceed to drink twelve beers and stumble there with my friends to drink more and stand in the basement and pee in the corner and talk to a few people that I don’t actually like and make out with a girl/boy/house plant before stumbling back home and peeing in my bed.

6. The hegemony, oh god, the hegemony.

7. Ehh suns out, I’ll just stay in and wait til winter. Wouldn’t want to get sun burn.

8. Yeah I’ve been hitting the gym baby, its bike season dummy.

9. Doorknob!

10. Big K.R.I.T… is he the bassist from that band 2 Chainz?


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